Written by James Dear

This blog follows my life through drug addiction, anxiety and life's challanges. I cover my own experiences as well as the loss of several friends to suicide. I want to share my knowledge in the hope that we can save lives and all live a happier and more fulfilled life.

December 25, 2020

My name is Katy-Jane, I share my life with my husband, Alex, my wonderful daughter, Ruby, our dog Piggy and two rabbits named, Daniel and Tripod (don’t ask)!

I gave birth to Ruby at home on the 24th of May 2017 at 8.07pm. During my pregnancy, I had the idea that I wanted to create a space online for her, a sort of visual diary and collection of her adventures that she can look back on as she grows. Over two and a half years later and I’ve finally taken the time out to start this project.

Time takes a lot but it can give you so much in return, during Ruby’s lifetime, even through pregnancy, I learnt so much – this is one of the many, beautiful gifts parenthood brings. This is also what allowed my original idea to develop into something else, evolving over time – like we all do. I by no means claim to have all the answers or hold the key to parenting, I have a lot to learn and welcome life’s education with open arms. I will be posting about our experiences as a family, exploring the many subjects I spent hours researching; hypnobirthing, breastfeeding, baby led weaning, travel, gentle parenting – the ups and downs. I am hopeful this space will serve as a useful resource to mums, like myself, trying their best in a world of confusion and mixed messages to parent responsibly and from the heart.

Sadly, my first post will be exploring one of the darkest topics you can endure as an individual, let alone a parent – grief. I have decided the most authentic way to begin a journey of honesty is with where we are now – struggling. Grief is often something we shy away from talking about, we are taught to put on a brave face for the sake of others but what does this truly teach our children? To hide away from their emotions? That particular emotions are wrong? I want to keep the conversation open for Ruby at a level that is suitable for her little toddler sized heart to take. For anyone suffering through the loss of a family member, you are not alone. You are never alone.

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